Character Development

When I was a kid, the story of Cinderella gave me hope. I identified with her. My two older sisters were sometimes mean. They bossed me around and made me work harder than they did. I felt trodden upon. But when I’d remember what Cinderella went through it encouraged me to take heart and not become bitter. Her story gave me hope that persevering in goodness would benefit me in the long run. And it did. 

IT WAS JUST A STORY – WHY DID IT WORK?

We are all Children at Heart . . . 

Our brains are better able to understand and recall a concept if it is learned in an emotional setting. A story does this. It creates one. Read more on the impact of stories here.

EDU DESIGNS was founded in 2007 

to create and distribute character building media to children, “While there’s still hope”, as my mother used to say.

But we must hurry! Kids are growing up every day, in need of what we offer. 

Years ago, my young son came home one day and said, “The reason I went to school wasn’t there today!”

“Why? What happened?”, I asked.

“They took art class out of my day.”

To this day, many districts are still sadly lacking in art. They cut back on their budgets, Art and Music are always the first to go. What we offer schools is a free initial presentation valued at $1,200 (in the educational workplace).

It’s exciting to see what happens when the students begin drawing. They start to discover ways to ‘see what they are looking at’ in a new way! (That’s the title of my Art Book for kids! At the bottom of this page is a link to get your own copy to download and share with someone you love.)

Not only does it give them something to want to go to school for, but  it motivates them to love learning and develop good character.

We need your help to continue this vital work!

It’s more important now than ever.

Children are the future.

Can you help?

 

Thank you,

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon, Director, EDU DESIGNS

We are an ALL VOLUNTEER Non-Profit. 100% of your donation goes toward sharing our materials, and NOT salaries. You are guaranteed a Tax Deductible Receipt. PLEASE GIVE!

 

When it’s getting cold outside and you struggle to answer the question, “What are we going to do today?”, keep reading and say goodbye to boredom with these activities! We offer a few ideas on ways you can utilize technology to tank tedium and give your kids an opportunity to learn something new.

Music

Your kids should learn to play at least one instrument. Whether they become good at it or not, there are numerous benefits from listening to and playing music. Children involved in music from a young age develop parts of their brain that would otherwise remain undeveloped.  Studies show that music can improve behavior, too. 

If they want to play the trumpet for instance, this 3,000-year-old wind-powered instrument inspires movement along with music to burn more than 100 calories an hour! (If buying your first brass wind, make sure to purchase necessary accessories and compare prices online. Student trumpets are typically less expensive than professional versions and will do the job of allowing your student to learn without a huge investment. Check out this trumpet buying guide from for more information and a description of the most common variations).

YouTube, Udemy, and ArtistWorks.com are great resources for lessons in all instruments and experience levels.

Here is a comprehensive article researching all aspects of choosing an instrument and lessons. 

Physical fitness

Another thing your kids need is a healthy dose of exercise each and every day. Adults are supposed to get at least 30 minutes of physical activity three to four days each week. The best way to ensure your kids do as well, is to get them in the habit now. A quick Google search will bring up tons of children’s fitness videos that cater to a wide range of interests and abilities. You can all find fun ways to get moving through everything from interpretive dance to more traditional exercises, such as cardiovascular workouts and using resistance bands.

On days when getting off the couch isn’t an option, you can keep mental fitness at the forefront of their growing minds with online activities provided by LearningGamesForKids.com

Art

One of the coolest things about art is that it’s not exclusive to a single culture. People in every corner of the globe create art in some shape or form. The ancient Egyptians had their stone statues, the Romans their mosaic tiles, and the cavemen had pigments made of crushed berries and stone wall canvases. Art is a universal expression of emotion and, like music, has a positive effect on developing brains and bodies. Drawing, painting, and even sculpting encourages neural connections and develops fine motor skills in young artists. No matter what your children want to learn, there is a tutorial online that will help them master the medium of their choosing. If you’re not sure where to start, check out free Artyfactory lessons on topics ranging from pencil portraits to African mask making. You may also download Ruth Elliott’s Art Book for free, here.

Art, music, and physical fitness can be combined with other subjects for a double dose of education. The possibilities are endless. For instance, you can incorporate art history with a drawing lesson, discuss the science behind how sound is made, or research ceremonial dances from ancient tribes.

Whether your kids want to channel their inner Beethoven, learn some new dance moves, or paint a Picasso, you’ll find everything you need to say goodbye to boredom on the same device you’re reading now. You and your kids can use the net to become engaged, entertained, educated in the arts and find new and interesting ways to get physically fit.

Contributed by Jenny Wise

Why Cycling Is One of the Best Exercises for Children

The ultimate wish a parent has for their child is for them to live a long, happy, and healthy life. Teaching children cycling is an invaluable and empowering skill that can help them do just that. Not only is it great for the body, it can also give children an instant mood boost and increased self-esteem.

Cycling improves physical fitness

Cycling is a great cardio-vascular workout that’s also low-impact — meaning it protects children’s developing joints. Most obviously, regular cycling can help control weight and curb childhood obesity, a serious issue on the rise due to sedentary lifestyles.

There are also many other physical benefits children can get from learning to cycle. It increases muscle mass and stamina, as well as ensures a healthy heart and lungs. A study published in the International Journal of Sports Medicine even found that cycling increased the longevity of cyclists in the Tour de France — by a whopping 17 percent!

Cycling is safe

Some parents may be concerned about the risks of cycling, but with the right preparation and precautions, it can be entirely safe. In fact, a study conducted by the British Medical Journal found that the numerous health benefits of cycling vastly outweigh the risks.

Make sure your bike rides are safe and enjoyable by choosing the right bike and wearing weather-appropriate clothing along with a well-fitting helmet. Bring water, snacks, sunglasses, a bike pump, and emergency tool kit, too (you can even teach your child important life skills, such as, how to fix a flat tire or tighten a loose chain, once they’re old enough). The all-round better you make your child’s experience of cycling, the more eager they’ll be to do it again.

Cycling is fun

Cycling is one of those rare physical activities that doesn’t feel like exercise — it’s just fun. Kids love the sense of freedom and independence cycling gives them. They’ll also get hours of enjoyment from being out and about, exploring their local area, and discovering new and interesting sights and locations. Cycling is truly a great way to encourage and foster their adventurous spirit.

Lastly, cycling is the perfect opportunity for the whole family to bond — and much better than simply zonking out in front of the TV. Family bike rides will give you time to talk and laugh together, which elevates everyone’s mood, as well as make positive memories you’ll all treasure for life!

Article contributed by Jenny Wise

Are you smiling?

I am. Thanks to you, WE DID IT!  

All the votes from supporters, earned EDU DESIGNS the Top Rated Award from Great NonProfits for 2017!

Here’s another way to help:

Do you shop online at Amazon?

Every time you do, Amazon will donate a portion to EDU DESIGNS…

All you need to do is go to smile.amazon.com, and choose Edu Designs as the Non Profit you wish to support 🙂

Then, bookmark the link, so each time you shop, you’ll start shopping from this link: smile.amazon.com.

The Amazon site, with the word “smile“ with a dot after it (.) added in front of the web address “amazon.com” tells you Amazon will donate to our Non Profit!
 
It’s a simple way to help us bring the arts and character to kids, without it costing you a penny!

It will put a smile on your face, too!

I appreciate your support. 

Warmest Wishes,

By the way – 

Want your kids to learn to say, “THANK YOU”, too?

Check out these tips, HERE!

EDU DESIGNS and GoMommyGO® exist to help create and distribute media for children’s character development. 

 

 

Volunteer. Donate. Review.

by Joyce Wilson

Middle school, which is typically comprised of grades six, seven, and eight, is a time of great change for students, most of whom are beginning to form their identity. While some students’ middle school experience can be made even more stressful by moving towns or cities, the struggles which face middle school-aged children tend to be universal. Parents should be prepared for the often perplexing changes their child will exhibit, equipping themselves with the tools to understand and facilitate their child’s physical and mental transition.

A New Age, a New Set of Challenges

Typically, middle schoolers in the United States are aged between 11 and 14. This is a time when a young person is experiencing biological processes which result in behavioral changes often beyond their control, many of which are not considered positive.

According to the U.S. Department of Education, children at this age face challenges which are physical, emotional/psychological, intellectual, social, and moral/ethical. Parents must understand what changes typically are taking place in middle schoolers to help their child overcome these confusing challenges.

Physically, puberty leads to changes in appearance and stature which can result in lowered self-confidence, which exacerbates emotions that make them self-conscious and sensitive to criticism. While they tend to be intellectually hungry, this typically manifests in the form of real-world experience: developing friendships and other relationships. Contrarily, middle schoolers tend to be less receptive to academic information. Often, grades will slip due to preoccupation with forming relationships and establishing their modes of interaction with peers.

A middle schooler’s natural drive toward individuality and independence can lead to rebellion and distancing from one’s parents. They also tend to begin forming a personal sense of morality that can lead to dissenting thought within the home or toward authority in general, instead turning to friend groups as their closest confidants.

Allowing a child to establish their own identity is crucial, but permitting a middle schooler to form their own set of rules and attitudes is not the answer, either.

Finding the Line Between Guidance and Independence

Children spend about 50 percent less time with their parents in middle school than in their elementary years. While granting space is a necessary aspect of identity formation, parents should not take a hands-off approach.

Parents should continue to promote family activities, though not as a substitute for a child’s activities with peers who constitute a positive influence. Setting clear, fair rules is the first step in allowing your child to pursue independence on responsible terms.

It is also important to ensure that a child does not indulge the temptation to neglect their studies, as this can form negative habits that persist into high school. There are a number of ways that parents can keep their child motivated to excel in their schoolwork, and utilizing tips which foster long-term organizational skills is one of the greatest benefits a parent can impart on their child in terms of educational and professional success.

Be vigilant toward whom your child is surrounding himself with, as peer influences are one of the greatest indicators of whether a young person will have positive or negative self-esteem. Surrounding oneself with well-adjusted peers who exhibit prosocial traits promotes a strong moral compass that serves as a universal guiding light when it comes to decision making and reacting to peer pressure.

The social and behavioral changes that come with middle school are perhaps most important when employing strategic parental guidance, but preparing a child for the more micro details of enrolling in a new school must not be ignored.

A New School, a New Routine

Most children must feel comfortable in their surroundings to fully thrive and exercise good habits and decision making. Getting your child acclimated to their new school begins with familiarizing them with the building before the first day of the school year.

Whether it means taking occasional walks around the school’s neighborhood or participating in a tour of the school, familiarity breeds comfort. Comfort is difficult to find for a middle schooler, so make sure that you impart organizational skills that they will be less-than-eager to adopt.

Preparing your child with the skills and items – folders, binders, pencils, etc. – which are required can give them a boost toward establishing a good rapport with their teachers, who in turn can serve as a network of mentors during such a trying time.

Conclusion

Changing schools, usually an unavoidable aspect of starting middle school, is never easy. The biological changes that drive attitude and identity formation make the transition even more confusing and anxiety-inducing for a young person.

For parents, understanding is the first step toward helping. Once they understand the changes the child is experiencing – changes every parent went through themselves – they can begin to effectively assist their child without infringing on their budding sense of individuality and self-identity.

I was 6 years old when my family got our first TV. Mom would only let us watch The Mickey Mouse Club. I remember the excitement at 5 o’clock when the show would begin – and then the feeling of letdown when it was over. Then Mom would say, “GO OUT AND PLAY!” 

She limited us to a half hour a day, sensing that too much could become addicting, something that scientific research has clearly shown.

Why is ‘TV’ so much fun?  When exposed to electronic media, our brains are flooded by a rush of dopamine, whether cartoons, video games or other forms of passive entertainment. 

Dopamine is the reward neurochemical that elevates our mood, allows us to feel joy, become motivated, and gives us the readiness to act.  Unfortunately, when the excitement is not ‘burned off’ through physical activity, frustration and anxiety can follow. An endless bombardment to media exposure can cause diminishing returns. Our Dopamine receptors become blocked, gradually allowing less and less in, making us need stronger ‘doses’ to get the same thrill we got originally. 

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”600px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]Symptoms of Dopamine Deficiency are: lack of motivation,  fatigue,  apathy,  procrastination,  inability to feel pleasure,  low libido,  inability to connect with others,  sleep problems,  mood swings,  hopelessness,  memory loss,  inability to concentrate,  inability to complete tasks,  engaging in self-destructive behaviors, especially addictions (from: https://bebrainfit.com/increase-dopamine/)[/dropshadowbox]

The same mechanism happens with overeating, which can lead to Type II diabetes. When we eat, Insulin is released, telling a cell to open to receive the ‘food’ (glucose). After exposure to too much sugar,  insulin receptors will stop responding, and though our blood may be overloaded with glucose, the cells will not open to utilize it and turn it into energy. This causes a feeling of continual hunger and fatigue, as well as other problems as the excess sugar that’s floating through our clogs our organs. 

Whether food or media, there’s only so much we can handle, before our body says, ‘NO.”  

[dropshadowbox align=”center” effect=”lifted-both” width=”500px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ] TOO MUCH “TV” PART OF THE PROBLEM?[/dropshadowbox]

It’s no wonder so many children are beset by ADHD, obesity and other problems these days. Though it seems obvious that too much media, junk food and lack of exercise could be hurting them (and us) we are loathe to admit it, because we are enjoying the convenience of just sitting the kids in front of the TV.

Luckily, there are ways to get around the dopamine-blocking effects of too much media.

Not surprising, according to studies, the answer is: Exercise, Good Diet, Meditation and controlling our exposure to addictive substances. This can restore our dopamine receptors to their healthy state, allowing us start enjoying our lives again.

I am not one of those that say ‘NO’ to all electronic media. To me, MODERATION is the answer.  Unfortunately, until a child is old enough to develop SELF Control, it’s up to the parent to train a child in good habits of media use. But that’s hard. There’s no easy way. The jailer is a prisoner, too.

Long before EDU DESIGNS was incorporated in 2007, I had a dream: To help children gain wisdom for living.

The important influences on children have long been: Family, School, and Friends. But when Television came on the scene, it became both a new friend and also an enemy, opening Pandora’s box to a world of things you can’t ‘un-see’ once you’ve seen them. People you would never let into your house enter through that window if you allow them. 

As a parent of 7 children, I saw what the wrong kinds of TV shows could do to my children’s behavior from fine to frenetic in a matter of minutes. I needed to watch with them, to see it from their eyes. If a program’s ‘excitement’ caused emotional distress we would have to discuss it so they could process their feelings before they could be calm again. Many times I would wonder why I ever let them watch the program in the first place. And choose something else the next time.

My aim is to use media’s powerful instructional ability to teach valuable lessons while protecting a child’s vulnerable heart and mind from harm. That’s why I’ve created an art textbook for kids, to develop their brains and hearts through hands-on activities.

Do you agree this is important? Please give us a 5-star rating on Great Non Profits to share your thoughts on what we are doing.

I am grateful for everyone who has already given us a review. Your thoughtfulness will help us reach more children, parents and teachers who need it.  

 

 

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon, Founder and Director of EDU DESIGNS

 

 

PS – Read what other folks say about us here…

References:

bebrainfit.com/increase-dopamine/

https://academic.oup.com/bioscience/article/49/7/513/236613/Addiction-and-the-brainThe-dopamine-pathway-is

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4114517/

http://bigthink.com/videos/steven-kotler-on-addictions-and-dopamine

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-athletes-way/201612/zero-motivation-exercise-dopamine-receptors-could-be-why

Being thoughtful, caring and sensitive to others is a good thing. Right?

Sure. But if you are an empathetic person who hasn’t learned to care for yourself, too, you can easily fall into the trap of being used, but not respected. A Doormat. 

Feeling Stepped On?

With my first child, I unconsciously feared that if I said ‘no’ to any request, it would cause her emotional damage. By the time she had turned three, I realized I knew NOTHING about handling a toddler-terrorist who had come to expect to get her own way.

Luckily I was thrown a life preserver, a book called, ‘Dare To Discipline’, by Dr. James Dobson. It kept me from drowning and gave me the tools I needed. I learned to say, “No”, to deal with temper tantrums, and to stand my ground. Later on I realized:

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”600px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]“THE BEST TIME TO DISCIPLINE A TEENAGER IS WHEN THEY ARE THREE YEARS OLD!”[/dropshadowbox]

Through the years I would make new mistakes, but I continued to seek out parenting wisdom from many sources: Chris Thompson, the Toddler-Whisperer; Charlotte Mason, a respected Homeschool expert; and Darlene Lancer, an expert on conquering codependency. All of them helped me examine myself, to uncover the causes of my own tendency to bend over backwards trying to please people, not just my toddler.

All Experts Agree that Kids Should Be Disciplined, but HOW? 

Though most parents have admitted to spanking their kids at times, psychologists agree that: 

Spanking is hitting, and hitting is harmful. 

One behavioral therapist with 25 years experience said,

“There is NEVER a reason to inflict pain on a child. If that is the only way a parent thinks they can gain compliance, they are sadly mistaken. Cultivating mutual respect, consistent limit setting…removes the need to ever have to spank a child. You can’t teach a child to not hit when you are hitting them…  I teach positive parenting and collaborative problem solving…so much better than spanking.”

Dr. Dobson, agrees.

To shape the will without breaking the spirit is the challenge.

To prevent child abuse and practice positive parenting, check out these resources.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”600px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]“Becoming more self-aware is the key to effective parenting.” ~Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon[/dropshadowbox]

The more you can analyze your own feelings and understand what’s really going on inside of YOU, the more you will become aware of what triggers your own anger, and can help you to see what your children are experiencing, too.

SPANKING is not DISCIPLINE. Discipline means ‘CHILD TRAINING’.

There are many non-violent ways to motivate your younger kids to cooperate, so they will WANT to do the right thing, and not because you force them. 

The first thing, after loving them, is to communicate clearly what you expect of them.

That is one reason I created my “Thank, Don’t Spank” behavior charts.

Get organized and plan ahead for good relations with your kids and family. Take advantage of this page for getting a plan, before you need it.

Don’t allow your children to walk all over you, but teach them firmly, without resorting to physical violence. There is a lot more to explore on this topic, so check out these other age-specific tips on discipline, here!

 

 

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon, Founder and Director of EDU DESIGNS

PS –  Can you help? If you appreciate me, please donate.

 

If you can, please take 2 minutes to give us a 5-star rating on Great Non Profits and share your thoughts on the importance of what we are doing.

Carl Rogers coined the phrase, “UNCONDITIONAL POSITIVE REGARD” which has become synonymous with what children need in order to grow to their full potential as healthy human beings. 

It includes:

An environment that genuinely and openly:

SEES the good in them,

LISTENS to them with empathy and

ACCEPTS them unconditionally. 

We all need that.

But especially in infancy, when one is helplessly dependent on parents or caregivers, a child will cling to them for safety and security, and adjust his behavior to assure he doesn’t lose them.

However if it feels unsafe to be who he really is, an infant may unconsciously want to ‘stuff’ that part of himself in order to get along. This can cause all kinds of emotional disconnects later in life, from angry outbursts, panic, fear, self loathing, addictions, an inability to feel one’s own needs or intuition, and more. 

This is why I said in one of my previous articles, “You Can’t Spoil A Baby”.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”550px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ] [/dropshadowbox]

Unconditional love does NOT mean you love everything they DO however, and as kids grow past infancy, they also need discipline and guidance to prepare them for life’s challenges. 

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”556px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]“Though we do have freedom of choice, we do NOT have freedom from the CONSEQUENCES of our choice.” ~Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon [/dropshadowbox]

Children who are not disciplined do not feel loved. So… 

LOVE your child as though you won’t have him tomorrow. . .

And TEACH your child as though he won’t have YOU tomorrow.

When you tie a growing plant to a stake to protect it from outside forces that would topple it over, you are not being cruel. Discipline is that stake. 

For tips on Discipline, read the next article, here. 

As much as your kids are worth loving, YOU are TOO. We will all make mistakes along the way, but if you are doing your best, that’s all you can do. 

So LOVE YOURSELF, OK?

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon, Founder, EDU DESIGNS

Each year we reach thousands of kids and teachers with our art lessons and media for good character.

We are grateful for everyone who gives, helping to support our work.

THANK YOU!

PS – Give us a 5 star rating on Great Non Profits to share your thoughts on the importance of character in media!

Read what other folks say about us, here…

Though her CD was titled, ‘Awkward Annie’, this talented artist, singer, copywriter, and volunteer for non profit causes, proves you always get more by giving.

Annie Elliott was recognized as a powerhouse by the organization She Runs It, who flew her to NY to receive an award for NEXT GENERATION FEMALE LEADER at Forbes, on Sept. 13, 2017. 

Associate Creative Director for RPA Advertising, Annie has been a contributor to EDU DESIGNS media since 2014.  

We deeply appreciate the wealth of knowledge and expertise Annie brings with her about the creative arts, media, and its’ influence on society. 

One of Annie’s previous articles from 2014 highlights a ‘female leader’ from a previous generation: June Foray, who was the Queen of Voiceovers.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”275px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ][/dropshadowbox]

Though she passed on at the age of 99, EDU DESIGNS was blessed to have June contribute her voice to our animated short, Somebody Needs You, which premiered at San Diego Comic-Con in 2016. Read more about how June’s contributions are helping kids learn empathy, here. 

At EDU DESIGNS, our team of volunteers researches media and networks with others who care about children’s character so we can bring you the best. 

Each year we reach thousands of kids and teachers with our art lessons and media for good character.

We are grateful for everyone who gives to support our work.

There are LOTS of ways you can give, too. See here.

THANK YOU!

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon, Founder, EDU DESIGNS

PS –  Give us a 5 star rating on Great Non Profits to share your thoughts on the importance of character in media!

Read what other folks say here…

When Hope Seems Lost | Emergency Suicide Help Resources

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”500px” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ][/dropshadowbox]

When feelings of depression make it feel as though you have nowhere to turn, take one more step and you will find a network of support. You can’t do this alone.

Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800.273.8255)

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a nationwide network of professional services that offer no-cost emotional support to people in crisis 24 hours a day. The lifeline has been in existence since January 1, 2005 and is independently evaluated by a team at the Research Foundation for Mental Hygiene at Columbia University. Lifeline organizations receive ongoing guidance and consultation from suicide prevention experts across the globe.

The Badge of Life Police Suicide Prevention Program

Law enforcement officers are in a unique position of helping people every day. However, even the most seasoned officers can bend under the stress. If you are a current or former LEO visit BadgeOfLife.com for more information on resources you can use today to take a step on the path toward recovery.

Ask your Teachers

Suicide is the second leading cause of death in students from late elementary through college age. Teachers, guidance counselors, and school administrative staff are trained to offer compassion and seek help for people considering suicide. These are trusted professionals who understand the pressures of societal expectations and increasing academic pressure.

Veteran Crisis Line (800.273.8255 Press 1)

Former active-duty military men and women may utilize the Veterans Crisis Line, part of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. This confidential helpline is available around-the-clock 365 days a year. Veterans may also chat online for support by visiting VeteransCrisisLine.net any time. The site also provides special support and consideration for active duty personnel, homeless veterans, and friends and family of current and former military men and women.

Hospitals

Hospitals are a safe place where those in the throes of depression can receive emotional and physical support in times of extreme duress. Most medical complexes offer emergency care for individuals with suicidal thoughts. Emergency rooms are open 24/7 and provide a nonjudgmental environment to receive help and guidance.

Police/Fire stations

If you’re away from home with suicidal thoughts and feel you have nowhere to turn, your local police or fire station can help. Policeman, fireman, EMTs, and paramedics are trained to handle these situations.

911

Even when you may not believe it is a true emergency, suicidal thoughts should be treated as such. Any time there is the potential for loss of life, 911 is an option. Dispatchers will ask you some questions and send someone to help. Most likely, this will be the police and local paramedics who will transport you discreetly to the nearest local hospital. Rest assured, you will not be forcibly restrained (unless you pose an immediate threat to yourself or others) or treated like a criminal. Local law enforcement’s job is not to put you in handcuffs and lock you away; they are there to save your life and to save your loved ones the pain of your loss.

Safe Place

Safe Place is a youth outreach program that works to provide immediate emergency resources for young people. They are most often found in metropolitan areas at businesses, libraries, bus stations, and youth-oriented sports complexes such as the YMCA. Safe Place’s mission is to ensure an effective response system for in-crisis teens from age 12 through 17. Though often associated with runaway services, designated Safe Place locations offer supportive resources for young people dealing with a variety of issues including abuse, drug overdose, and those with suicidal thoughts.

If you feel as though all hope is lost, any of the above resources can point you in the right direction and assist you with getting the help you need. You are not alone. Help is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week; all you have to do is ask.

Thank you, Jennifer Scott, for the informative article!

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Click to DOWNLOAD The PRINTABLE Version. 

7 SUPER STRATEGIES to SUCCEED IN SCHOOL!

SUCCESS TO YOU!

Kids and Parents need all the help they can get.

EDU DESIGNS and GoMommyGO® are there to help.

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Being a parent is humbling. Anything you thought you knew about parenting before you had kids, soon vanishes as you find out how little you really knew.  It’s a miracle any of us survive!

Making mistakes is inevitable and usually the way we learn. 

However, the best way is by learning from someone else’s mistakes!

That way you won’t have to make them all yourself! 

Here are 5 to avoid:

Mistake # 1 – Not Paying Enough Attention: 

When you drive, you pay attention to the road, correct? But at home, you may want more time to get stuff done, and rely on TV and video games to ‘babysit’ them. But if you fail to pay proper attention to your children you not only endanger them, you are saying, without words, that they are not worth paying attention to. 

SOLUTION: Engage with your kids more to increase attachment and connectedness. Think, E.T.C. for 3 keys to good communication: 
EYE Contact,
Touch, and
Communication

(which includes Talking and Listening).   

Remember to enjoy your kids.

This period of their lives – and yours, will never come again.

LOVE them like you won’t have them tomorrow, and TEACH them like they wont have YOU tomorrow!

Read more here…  

Mistake # 2 – Being too strict, or too lenient:

Being too ‘nice’ is not really being nice, and in the long run, teaches kids to be lazy and selfish. Being too harsh can break your child’s spirit. Either extreme is bad.

Letting kids have too much time in front of electronic devices ends up backfiring.

SOLUTION: Like Dog Training, ‘Child training’, is a learned skill. We need to balance Love and Limits, and set boundaries.  You must be the Leader and take control. Learn how to discipline with love, limit electronic time, and KEEP THEM BUSY with other activities. Read more… 

Mistake # 3- Undermining your spouse’s authority in front of the children.

Having disagreements over how to raise the kids is inevitable now and then, but take care not to belittle or override your spouse in front of the children.

Trying to be ‘RIGHT’ all the time can be very wrong.

SOLUTION: Politely interject, “May I talk with you in the other room for a minute?”  Take your spouse aside quietly and share your ideas away from the kids. When you’ve come to an agreement, you can announce with a united front, “We have decided… etc”. If you can’t come to an agreement, go to counseling.

Mistake # 4 – Doing too much.

I used to be really good at that!

One day my son yelled out, “DAD! MOM HAD A NERVOUS WRECK!”

If you get caught up trying to get everything done, and ignore yourself and others, your patience can evaporate and your rapport with others, too. 

SOLUTION: SLOW DOWN – and face the fact that you will never get it all done. The only thing you can leave this world with is the love you’ve shared with others.

Two weeks after you are gone, your house will need cleaning again, so RELAX. Allow yourself to be ‘interrupt-able’. Kids need YOU.

Mistake # 5 – Not planning ahead.

Are you doing everything yourself?

Are others letting you?

They will, if you LET them!

SOLUTION: ORGANIZE. Have regular family meetings where you discuss family goals and desires. There is less chaos when there is order in the home. Share the problems you have getting everything accomplished. Divide the chores among everyone according to their abilities and I guarantee you will have more peace at home, as they all chip in to help. And they will feel proud of themselves in the end. Read more…

There’s lots more!

Make sure you take advantage of all the free resources on GoMommyGO®:

2 – FREE Illustrated Behavior charts on GoMommyGO (the 8 1/2 X 11 charts you download, customize and print up yourself)

2 – When you click on any image on THIS PAGE it takes you to what the image means.

3 – TIPS for PLANNING AHEAD

4 – What to do when you need to give CONSEQUENSES for bad behavior.

5 – How to use POSITIVE DISCIPLINE

My Illustrated, Customizable Behavior CHARTS are FREE! As an animation artist, I first created them for my own kids. They worked so well, that I thought, “Why isn’t someone doing this for the moms and dads who don’t know how to draw?”
In 2003 I put them online, and GoMommyGO® quickly became a resource for Autism Speaks, Headstart groups, many pre-schools, parents and teachers.

It’s been a labor of love for over 14 years.
Will you help support this non profit work?

When you do, I have a special gift for you!

You’ll get an instant download of my 100 Printable BEHAVIOR CARDS that help you get organized!  A $9.99 value to use and share with others! 

The 3.5″ x 2″ images (business-card size) are perfect for planning ahead. Here’s a sample of what they look like:

When you click on the image above, it will take you to Paypal. Give what you can, then keep the page open and you will be redirected to your activity cards.  For full instructions and how to print, refer to this page.

EDU DESIGNS and GoMommyGO® are helping thousands of children and parents every day, providing materials for creativity and character development.

Thank you for helping the adults of tomorrow, today!

 

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon
Director, EDU DESIGNS
Creator, GoMommyGO® 

Tweet to @G0MommyGO

I love the taste of most non dairy creamers, like Coffee mate, but the corn syrup and partially hydrogenated oils (trans fats) they contain promote inflammation, the precursor to most diseases like arthritis and cancer.

Honey (or real maple syrup) is better for you than corn syrup or refined sugars. Both Coconut oil and Turmeric contain anti-inflammatory, anti-alzheimer’s properties, too!

I was determined to find a way to make my own coffee creamer without bad ingredients and avoid the guilt as well as the inflammation. 

And I FOUND it – in my OWN KITCHEN!

Here’s my recipe: (Download it here)

Ingredients (If you are allergic to any of these ingredients, omit them):

Water

Coconut oil

Honey (or real Maple Syrup)

Almond Milk, Coconut Milk, or Soy milk

Lecithin*

Vanilla

Spices as desired (I add Turmeric, Cinnamon, Ginger, Nutmeg, Cardamom, Cloves and a pinch of black pepper. All are beneficial for you! When I add them all it tastes like a pumpkin spice Latte!)

INSTRUCTIONS:

Add in blender:

1 Cup very hot Water (If the coconut oil is solid, use boiling water)

1/2 Cup Coconut oil (if the coconut oil is solid, just look at the side of the blender to watch the water level rise to a cup and a half)

3 Tablespoons of real Vanilla

1 heaping Tablespoon of Lecithin*

Honey, Maple Syrup or Stevia to taste 

(Note: I add 3/4 Cup of honey. However, you can use less or more.  Avoid artificial sweeteners, like Splenda, Sweet n Low, etc. which contain Aspartame, a known nerve toxin)

OPTIONAL: 2 TBLSP Turmeric powder, plus a TBLSP of Cinnamon, a tsp of Ginger, 1/2 tsp each of Nutmeg, Cardamom, Cloves, and a pinch of black pepper, which increases the absorption of CoQ10).

Blend at low speed until mixed

(30 seconds or so)

With blender still running,

slowly add 3 cups of almond, coconut or soy milk for another 15 seconds or until thoroughly mixed:

Refrigerate.

Shake before using.

It will get thicker as it cools.

Have fun experimenting, and adjust to YOUR taste!

* Lecithin is good for you. It is a natural emulsifier, which blends oil and water, and contains many brain boosters, like Phosphatidyl Choline & Other Phosphatides. Sunflower Lecithin is a bit more expensive, but for those avoiding Soy, it’s better.

• Both Non-GMO Soy Lecithin, or Sunflower Lecithin are available at Health Food Stores or iHerb.com.

I get my powdered Turmeric at iherb.com, as well.

By the way – there is a discount promo code for first time customers when you search from this link!  https://www.iherb.com/?rcode=KID067

Enjoy!

PS – and remember to download the recipe here!

Ruth Elliott-Hildson, Director, EDU DESIGNS

We are an ALL VOLUNTEER Non-Profit. 100% of your donation goes toward sharing our materials, and NOT salaries. You are guaranteed a Tax Deductible Receipt. PLEASE GIVE!

 

There’s an old saying, “The burden we bear alone is twice as hard to carry.”

Being connected makes the difference.

When I was a child my mom and I would walk a long way to the grocery store. It was hard to keep up unless she would hold my hand. When she did, somehow her energy would be transmitted to me, and it was easier to go the distance.

As Claudia Gold reveals in her excellent post:

 “Connectedness . . . protects us against the harmful effects of stress.” 

And connectedness is needed by adults as well as children. When my seven kids were little, there were days when the thought of cleaning the house weighed on me like a sack of bricks.

Shoveling mud uphill daily was a constant activity. But if I knew that someone I liked was coming over, the work breezed by. It was the anticipation of a supportive friend being there that made the work easier to accomplish, even fun. 

Just the IDEA of being connected to someone can make a positive difference!

Gabor Mate speaks about the need for ATTACHMENT.  He says, “Children who feel abandoned will abandon their authenticity for the sake of an attachment.”

Why?

Because unconsciously every child knows they can’t survive without someone taking care of them.

That also explains the truth in what a wise mother once told me, “Never yell at your kids, because they will start to lie.” The fear of abandonment is so real, they’d rather hide their true feelings than be rejected.

If you’re someone who has failed at connecting with others, think about whether you’ve learned to sacrificed your own authenticity in order to “go along to get along”. This in turn can lead to you dismissing other people’s feelings, too, as if to say, “Hey –  I wasn’t allowed to feel that way, so you shouldn’t either!”

The cure for this is to develop a capacity for empathy for yourself. Then you will be more willing to allow for the foibles and failings of others, understand that it’s OK to be human, and to have feelings. 

To learn self acceptance you will need to find someone who will listen and respond without judgement. Otherwise you’ll be in the same leaky boat as before, trying to convince them of the person you think they think you should be. And you won’t feel ‘safe’ to be yourself.

This is all unconscious programming in kids. Some things are more ‘caught than taught’.

Bottom line? A good relationship requires Authentic Connectedness.

Say what you mean, but don’t say it mean.

You throw the ball to me.

I throw it back.

Simple, right? It’s a fun game if you allow it to be.

And yet sometimes we forget to ‘catch the ball’, much less ‘throw it back’!

To have real communication, or ‘connectedness’ with our friends, children, or spouse, we need to establish a good rapport.

That happens by SEEING, LISTENING, and RESPONDING to them.

We express connectedness through EYE CONTACT, BODY LANGUAGE and KIND WORDS…

To truly understand what another says, we need to FEEL, and SENSE what our instincts are saying at the same time as we hear the words.

When your ears hear the words, your brain PROCESSES the information using our thinking, feeling and instinctive centers to understand it.

For a relationship to grow positively and allow for authenticity, think before you speak:

Is it loving? Is it kind? Is it helpful?

When you communicate, make an effort to combine your MIND, HEART and INSTINCTS to really connect with others. It’s a great ‘people skill’ that gets better with practice!

Ruth Elliott-Hilsdon
Director, EDU DESIGNS
Creator, GoMommyGO® 

Kids and Parents need all the help they can get.

EDU DESIGNS and GoMommyGO® are there to help.

SEE HOW CONNECTING WITH KIDS THROUGH OUR ART PRESENTATIONS HELPS KIDS IN SCHOOL!

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What will YOUR kids stand for?

What’s the old saying?

“If you don’t STAND for SOMEthing, you’ll fall for anything!”

When my kids were little, I was losing ground. My utopian dream of bringing loving, creative people into the world was turning into a nightmare.  Just being a ‘good example’ wasn’t working. The ‘nicer’ I became, the more they took advantage and were becoming people I disliked: Greedy, selfish, mean, petty and squabbling. I had to put my foot down. 

Time For A Family Meeting

“All right, guys. There’s been too much fighting going on. We need to work things out. FAMILY MEETING TIME!”

We usually had a Family Meeting once a week, but when something extreme came up, we would have them at any time. We sat in a circle in the living room and I reminded them of the rules of the meeting: 

1- Sit quietly,

2- Listen carefully,

3- If you have something to say, raise your hand and wait your turn.

Make A Family Constitution

I challenged the kids to think:

“Who ARE we, anyway? What do we STAND for? What VALUES do we hold dear? We need to decide what kind of people we want to be. We need to create a ‘Family Constitution’.”

Taking notes, each child contributed what they thought were important rules for good behavior – points to add to our Family’s ‘Constitution’. Soon we had a list of ‘DO’s and DON’TS’ we all agreed on, and taped the list to the kitchen wall.

Things like:

DO: Be kind, helpful, do chores, feed the animals, do homework, etc…

DON’T: Fight, stick out your tongue, cuss, hit, yell or throw things, etc.”

Whenever anyone did something wrong (or right), we would add that infraction or good character trait to the list, and soon we needed to add more pages and the list was as long as my arm!

At our next meeting We looked at our list again. 

Then it came to us. All the items on the list boiled down to one rule that applied: That if we could treat one another the way we wanted to be treated, it would solve most of our problems.

THAT said it ALL!

“Treat others the way YOU want to be treated” became our new “Family Constitution”. When a conflict came up, the way to resolve it became simpler. 

The good thing about going through the exercise of listing all the do’s and don’ts was that it forced us to examine ourselves, to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes, and observe how our actions and attitudes affect others. It increased our empathy for one another, and showed us that everything we do is creating the kind of person we are becoming.

John Jolliffe once said:

“THE WAY YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF IS BOTH YOUR PUNISHMENT AND YOUR REWARD.

YOUR JOB IS TO BECOME THE KIND OF PERSON YOU CAN LOVE!”

What kind of person do YOU love?

Are you becoming that person?

Love and Warm Wishes,

Potty Training can be a JOY, and NOT a CHORE
– IF YOU MAKE IT A GAME!

This worked for my 7 kids: Make a ladder like the one here, (from adding machine paper, etc., or print this out), and tape it on the wall right near the potty. Choose an inexpensive prize to buy that you know your child will enjoy (a small toy, a lollipop, a candy, etc.) plus a pack of small stickers in advance (and HIDE IT!). Draw or paste a picture of the prize in the square above the ladder. Each time your child goes potty in the RIGHT PLACE (on the pot) they will get a sticker, starting at the bottom of the ladder. Praise him enthusiastically, and mention how each time he does, he will get a sticker, and when he gets to the top, he will win the prize! (If the prize is candy – DO NOT give him ANY Candy AT ANY OTHER TIMES UNTIL HE HAS EARNED IT by doing his ‘JOB’! Many kids enjoy placing their earned sticker on their chart by themselves – and show them where it goes. That in itself will be a temporary satisfaction for their good behavior until they have earned their ‘big’ prize on top.

If he has an accident outside the bathroom, instead of scolding, just say, “I’m sorry, I can’t give you a sticker this time. But next time, when you do it on the potty, I can give you a sticker!” Make another chart after they complete the chart and win the prize, and before long it will be a habit, even without the prize!

You get a PRIZE, too:

a potty-trained child!

Question: What if they pee on the pot but poo in their pants and then hide it?
Be calm, don’t mind the mess, and never shame your child for natural functions. Someone along the line has made them feel bad about pooping.
You don’t want your child to hold it in and get constipated, so let your little one to know it’s quite natural to poo – and you can’t wait till you see them pooing on the pot! If you stay with your child and sit and talk, it will be fun and not something to be ashamed of. Let them know how proud you are when they do it in the right place. Usually after a meal people have the urge to go – especially if they get enough liquids. Give ’em more liquids and watch ’em go! But above all, Don’t shame them for ‘accidents’. I LOVE the approach of a wonderful mom named Tara. Check out her blog on potty training here. What she is doing is really the thing that makes any ‘technique’ work- the love and cooperative spirit that you show in being there for your kids. You are on their side, and they can feel it, see it and know it for the great support that it is. How could they NOT want to cooperate with someone like that?

Question: What about while they are learning? Should I use ‘pullups’ or regular underwear?

HEIDI (a fantastic mother of FIVE) made this wise observation ABOUT ‘pull-ups’:
“Pullups = a diaper ; a DIAPER = go ahead and pee.”
I agree! SMART MAMA, HEIDI! THANKS for your contribution to the mom’s and kids of the world! I could never afford pullups anyway and thought they were probably invented to get more of my hard-earned money! Some ‘experts’ believe that children actually learn faster when they can feel their ‘mistake’ running down their legs, but you do have to be able to afford the time and handling more mess to allow it! But what about kids DOESN’T involve mess? There’s no avoiding it – JUMP RIGHT IN FOLKS! Join the FUN!

Question: What  about CONSTIPATION?

In Constipation, the one thing that always seems to be the problem is a need for more fiber, probiotics, plus more water in the diet, (grape juice works wonders too!). To show the kids how drinking more water helps them go to the bathroom easier, you can demonstrate the mechanics this way: Stuff a wad of toilet paper into an empty toilet paper tube, hold it over the sink and try to shake the paper out the bottom of the tube. Then tell them, “This won’t come out, because it’s dry. BUT – if I pour water into the tube, it will come right out the bottom!”

Brenda Watson tells all about FIBER and it’s benefits: She calls it the HOPE method to improve health – Have you heard about her on PBS? Hope stands for:
H= High Fiber
O= Omega three oils
P= Probiotics
E= Enzymes
http://www.brendawatson.com/In-the-News/Brenda’s-News/HOPE/
I’ve learned a lot from watching her, and now I’ve lost 10 lbs without trying, plus never have constipation if I follow the diet that way. I heard someone say long ago:
“CONSTIPATION IS THE THIEF OF HEALTH” and it seems to be true!
Though it is a rather ‘crappy’ topic to discuss, it is important. Learn what you can, do your best and don’t worry – everything will come out all right in the end!

What about teaching them to WIPE? 

Here are some great links to help kids learn to wipe:

LINK 1: http://en.allexperts.com/q/Pediatrics-1429/teaching-child-clean-BM.htm
LINK 2: http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/8/586186
—From this site I read a cute ‘game’ you can make of wiping skills:
“We make a game of how many wipes it will take, so I will say, ‘I think it is a 3 wipe poo’ and he will say, ‘nope it is 5’, and promptly wipe and check, wipe and check and see who had the best guess before his bottom is clean!”
LINK 3: http://parents.berkeley.edu/advice/potty/wiping.html
LINK 4: http://www.thelaboroflove.com/articles/how-to-teach-your-child-to-wipe-while-learning-to-use-the-potty/